Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Swedish emporer bans MSN and Facebook

Read this hilarious chat transcript of my daughter mercilessly having fun with a defenseless American moron (my daughter is "you"):

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!


Stranger: hey

You: hiyaaaaa

Stranger: how u doing doing

Stranger: u f or m


Stranger: how old r u

You: eleventy billion years old

You: how old are you?

Stranger: 22

Stranger: u a f or a m

You: sorry i don't speak idiot

Stranger: are you a female or a male

You: female

You: you?

Stranger: male

Stranger: how old are you

You: 18

Stranger: nice where u from

You: sweden


You: you?

Stranger: usa


Stranger: do you have msn?

You: no they don't allow msn in sweden


You: the government : (

Stranger: that sucks

Stranger: do you use anythign chat

You: no the emperor has forbidden facebook and aim and stuff like that

Stranger: danggg

You: i know right totally sucksss


You: plus now that everybody has to dye their hair blond everybody just looks the same.. its really horrible



Stranger: that really sucks

Stranger: i cant live like that

You: i know im gonna move away from home the second i'm a legal adult

You: you're not legal till you are 29 in sweden..

Stranger: dangggg

You: i mean you can live away from home and stuff if you have permission from your parents

Stranger: what if u get married

You: only if you have permission from your parents..

Stranger: so u need permission from ur parents to get married

You: yeah untill you're legal

Stranger: i always wanna go to sweden also lol

Stranger: idk now lol

You: its a cool place for tourists you should totally come

Stranger: idk where to stay at thou

You: just be really carefull because there are certain districts they kill a lot of tourists and cut of their hair so they can make wigs


You: because everybody is blond

Stranger: fuck that lol

Stranger: no1 isnt chopping my hair off lol

You: no i get it.. what color is your hair?

Stranger: brown

You: if its blond you'll be ok


You: maybe dye your hair before coming

Stranger: lmao

Stranger: i do need to find a place to sleep at

You: i'd invite you to stay with me but the emperor doesn't allow sleepovers in stolcholm anymore.. not since elisa..


You: but hotels are super cheap

Stranger: lol ill sneak in

Stranger: wanna j oin me in the hotel

You: sure thing.. you just have to talk to my dad, or i will by thrown out of the village and have my clog medals taken away from me


You: but my dads cool, he doesn't mind.. just a formality you know

Stranger: ooo ok

Stranger: do you have any pics jw

You: http://www.klaus-ebbesen.dk/pic/gravbal.jpg

Stranger: real funny

You: omg i'm so embararsed i sent you the wrong link


You: so sorry this is a famous man from my country

Stranger: its ok

Stranger: ohhh

Stranger: so what is the link to ur pic lol

You: http://thealchemistblog.files.wordpress.com/2009/01/img_4462.jpg
You: omg sorry thats my dad just a sec i'll find the right one

Stranger: ok

Stranger: find it yet lol

You: sorry cant find anything but if you go oon facebook and search for iben hjejle you'll find me

Stranger: ok

You: http://www.billedbladet.dk/~/media/BilledBladet/Kendte/Nyheder/Iben%20Hjejle/Hjejlegldame.ashx?as=true&w=445


You: wait heres one


You: i was in the swedish american idol so i was in the news a lot lol

Stranger: nice

Stranger: u look pretty

You: i have to leave now the emperor says we have to go to bed


You: at exactly 7 o clock


You: or we will have our clog medals taken away


Stranger: ooo ok sorry bye

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